Monday, February 22, 2010

To Ben on your 10th birthday

Dear Ben,

I have been awake for a while now, thinking about what I would say to you on your birthday this year. Already, the tears are flowing, for I miss you so much that it is still a physical pain in my heart. What makes it harder is that your Dad is away on a band tour. I don't have his hugs today.

I don't know if I ever told you about the day an angel saved you from harm. You were little, not quite 2. It was late summer, and school would be starting soon. I would be teaching music 2 days a week at the girls' school and I had been praying about who would care for you on those days. I had just found out about a family at our Church who lived nearby and wanted to help us. The mother had two little ones at home and offered to watch you on those days. I brought all of you outside to play while I called this woman. You wanted to color with the sidewalk chalk on the driveway and the girls were riding bikes around you. I dialed the number and heard it ring. I had barely said hello when I looked up and you were no longer sitting there. I asked to her to wait a minute. I stood up and looked to see where you had wandered. Not by the swingset, so I turned toward the front of the house. There was a white truck at the edge of the driveway and a woman was holding you in her arms and walking up the driveway, telling me that you were about to wander into the street. I was so overcome, I just grabbed you and held you tight, crying at the idea of what could have happened. Then I remembered that I didn't say thank you to this kind lady, so I turned back around. She and the truck were gone. Vanished.

You were truly a blessing from above and I cherish every moment we shared with you. I thank God for the time we were given and I know I will hold you again someday.

Mom